Notes on Turning 40: What I’ve Learned

You know what sparked the inspiration for this short piece of writing? My partner! I laugh as I write this as  (at the time of me writing this) last week, I turned the big 40. This week while speaking to him on WhatsApp I told him, ‘I’ve got a pain in my knee.’ His dry, sarcastic, and witty response ( as usual which always makes me laugh) was that ‘already the joys of the 40’s is starting for you LOL.’ He too turned 40 last October.

I contemplated what he  said to me, I never even linked my knee pain to my new turn of a decade. In fact, I linked it to an old injury I had as a young teen that to this day still causes my knee to act up, but not in the way it has been this week!

In other conversations in the lead up to my 40th birthday, we spoke about ageing,  I said to him that, ‘ it’s different for men a few grey whiskers in your beard and a few in your hair are sexy! Men get more handsome with age.’ He kind of laughed and didn’t validate what I said in anyway in his own personal beliefs. I can only assume that for him personally he still sees beauty in women as they age, here’s hoping anyway!  I reflected on this too, and started to think about what it is that I have learned about life at this milestone age?

My twenties were full of fun, travelling, working on what was then my chosen career and life path, and gaining stability. This was until around my mid-twenties, my late twenties flipped 360 degrees when I decided on a new path, I also had my first real lesson learning when it comes to relationships and love which set me up for later experiences, I also became a very proud mother just as I entered my thirties.

In contrast to my twenties my thirties were filled with learning who I am, what I want, don’t want, I’d say my biggest growth in life and as a woman, human, mother, sister, daughter, cousin, aunty, friend, partner, and generally as a soul came in my thirties. That ‘growing pains’ stage that often is linked to the late teens– to mid- twenties for me came in my thirties, in particular my late thirties , that’s very bizarre. In my twenties I thought I had it all figured out! I knew who I was, what I wanted, what was important to me in life… I was dead-ass wrong! In some respects about that. I think the turning point came when I had my son  at thirty. Motherhood really gave me a different perspective of life, so did travel outside of the UK with a young child, learning about different cultures, and really being ‘open’ to all life has to offer. So, I guess at this milestone of forty  I’ve learned these things:

When It Comes to Life’s Direction:

You know, I think I can confidently say that it’s really okay if you have a ‘plan’ or even ‘plans’ and they don’t go to plan at all. By this I mean you think, feel, desire, and work towards something and it just blows up in your face. You may even feel like some kind of failure due to the outcome. That is until you really look deeply at why things happened. This can be said for relationships too. If things don’t pan out how you envision, try to understand why, what part you played, how you can ensure it doesn’t happen again and let that shit go, move on.

Another  thing about plans we may make is that sometimes there is a bigger plan for you, and your plan was just a tiny aspect of it to place you where you are meant to be. Keep that in mind too. In no way am I saying that you should just allow your plans to fail, but I am saying that if you truly know you had everyone’s best interest at heart, applied yourself, worked hard, really planned to make a success of whatever it is that did not pan out ( job, goal, relationship whatever) then you just have to walk away knowing that you did your best, and there is something better for you. A bigger ‘plan’ that you need to journey to.

 

Be Selective With Friends, Associates, and Your ‘Tribe’ of People!

 This is something that I ‘saw’ with others a lot in my twenties, and I did also experience myself.  However, as I look back now  at forty and reflect I only cottoned onto this life hack later, in my late twenties-early thirties.  In life you will come across people who claim to be friends, or even want to be friends with you and it is not always for a reason you would imagine. As in, it’s not about the innocence and beauty of friendship and connection itself, there is a hidden motive, agenda, or something they want, need, desire, or sadly are jealous of about you! Yes, jealous, some souls might be attracted to you and spark up a friendship with this mindset.

Over the years I’ve become more aligned with the belief that people have an ‘energy’ about them. Myself included.  The more I observe people, interact with people of different cultures, religions, backgrounds, belief systems, and generally go about my daily business I pick up on this about people. This ‘energy’ is what will introduce you to the world before you’ve even opened your mouth, if you’re authentic. In some cases, people will try to portray an energy that is not what it appears. Ever heard the saying. ‘All that glitters is not gold’, that’s what I mean when your mum or elderly relative told you that.

Without sounding like a pessimistic soul, or putting a real downer on people and making connections, I do want to say that I have learned that you need to be mindful of who you allow into your private life, space, energy, and claim as a friend. I have a natural ENFJA personality type based on the  sixteen personality types; it is very accurate for me! So naturally I am more extroverted, have no problem speaking with people, meeting new people, and being in social situations which is often why I find it very easy to make friends in person and via social media, but I am genuine and authentic with who and what I am… not everyone out there is.

Whether you are introverted or extroverted like me and have an ease with people, protect your energy. Get to know people well enough before you really trust them. It could also be that I am an Aquarius and I am true to my star sign’s trait of being a people person but a ‘popular loner’ meaning, people will get all of the real me, but I don’t need to be close and tight with everyone at first I do believe in the power of building connections. That is unless you meet someone and you jus know they are part of your ‘tribe’. This happens when you are able to pick up on the energy of people I spoke about, and spot the sense from the nonsense, or the smoke and mirrors that people can sometimes give you.

In my days at university, I met a wonderful girl who over ten years later, we are still in contact and we don’t even live in the same country any more. The day we met we clicked, and stuck together as students, job searching, having families, etc and it’s because she is very authentic and a genuine friend of mine. Every time we talk on the camera which may not be often we spend hours!! There’s a lot of love between us. My point here with this learning is that you must be selective, go into situations with others with your eyes wide open, not a barrier up on your personality or who you are, or your ‘realness’ just your eyes open! When you feel a genuine connection with another person’s soul, guard it, nurture it, keep it, honour it, be a good friend, and be there for each other even if you are in different time zones and locations.

Cut People Off (Energetically) Who Don’t Serve You And/Or Disrespect you.

Listen, I am as bold as brass when it comes to deciding that I need to cut ties with a situation, person, place, or thing that is negatively impacting my health, wealth, mental state, and energy. I want everyone to do this. I have learned that too often we ( as in you and I) can make excuses for people’s narcissistic ways, negative behaviour, abuse, and general disrespect when you yourself may have done none of these things.

No, it needs to stop now. Learning to be strong enough to say, ‘enough is enough’ is a game changer. You don’t have to be nasty, rude,  or disrespectful . Just energetically remove people from your space and life. This can look and feel different for everyone, but for me it’s a simple block, delete, and no contact. Sometimes there’s not even an explanation. In most cases where I have had to energetically distance myself from a person , situation, place, or thing who is disrespectful to me etc I have tried, tried, and tried, to  articulate ‘what’s up’ and they have not listened. Later in life I slowly learned that in order to protect my peace in life, it’s best to not ignore red-flags and cut off what does not serve who you are, are what you wish, especially if you have done nothing to deserve what you are experiencing. Let no person, situation, place, or thing be immune to this energy block from you. I mean no one! Family too! Take this life hack and apply it as needed! Just don’t allow anyone to mistreat you purposefully and expect that you’ll be okay with it.

Ideal Romantic Partners Are Based on Characteristics, First.

What I have learned is that often times you ( as in you and I)  can focus on the wrong things, always date a person’s character first focus on this a lot as well as the physical attributes and attraction. You may even find that the person you ‘click with’ is someone so unassuming, and maybe not who you would have imagined! And when this happens it can be such a wonderful experience, as you have been matched based on:

  • Character.
  • Values.
  • Energy.
  • Real connection that can develop into love.

A person’s character and energy should be the things you measure and get to know. Even if this person is of a different race, background, part of the world, etc to you if their character and energy matches yours , makes you feel love, protected, safe, provided for, they are stable mentally, emotionally, financially, and spiritually, and is a good father or mother figure etc this is who you should be dating and commit to. Not the man or woman who society says you should date, or the man or woman that only has physical attributes to offer you that will disappear as they age anyway, not the man or woman that you have any major doubts or red-flags with. Do not fall for the ‘okie doke’ people can give you and date their character, who a person shows you who they are believe them. If they lie, cheat, steal, abuse, but ‘ make you laugh and are attractive’ the whole person needs to be thrown away as they have shown you who they are, regardless of if they ‘make you laugh and are good looking.’ This is just an example but you get my point, what good is a person to date and commit to if their character and energy is off as a person? No good, none at all!

I’ve also learned to be very open when it comes to dating, have your ideal list of who you are attracted to yes, but  I’m talking directly to women here: don’t cut yourself off from men outside of your ‘box’  age, race, height, etc as you may find a man outside it that completely takes over it! … In a good and positive way!

 

Understand Your Love Language, Now!

I smile as I write this, one of the best books I have ever read in the non-fiction genre is Five Love Languages: Secret To Love That Lasts  by Gary Chapmen .  This book will help you understand not only how you wish to be loved and can select a partner who ‘speaks your love language,’ it will also help you understand how your partner or future partner wishes to be loved. If you understand your own love language you are more likely to avoid those who don’t understand it, and save heart ache and time wasting. If you understand another person’s love language you are more likely to be able to love them well. The result of understanding love languages and dating a person who speaks yours, and you speak theirs ( naturally without force or difficulty) can, will, and does lead to long lasting partnerships. The research the professor did for the book clearly highlights how and why understanding love languages is a key starting point, as well as dating a person’s character.

I wish I had learned about this book in my twenties! I didn’t read it until I was around maybe thirty-four, now at forty I can honestly say I recommend it to everyone!

 

Have A  Financial Plan, Always

One thing I have learned is when it comes to money, always think of tomorrow, and the day after, not just today. It’s as simple as that. Strive to have good financial planning, live within your means or budget, don’t try to impress others, and place your investment into things that ‘appreciate’ with value not ‘depreciate’ as much as you can.

When it comes to finances and relationships, always date someone who has a similar financial outlook on life as you! If not you’ll have a very hard time. One of the biggest causes of relationship strain and break up is: financial management, or lack of it.

Remember Who You Are And Be Who You Are

It sounds so cliché but it’s true, I’ve not heard a truer word yet. In my experience of life so far at forty, I can honestly look back and say there were times I ‘thought’ I was myself, but it was more like what was expected of me, or I misunderstood what  and who it is I really am, until life experiences happened and shaped me into who and what I really am. Stand strong in your own authentic self, whoever you are, don’t hide it.

Find out who you are, find your purpose, spend time working on and with yourself, be selfish and do that work. I promise you if you can fully work out who you are, why you are here, what you want, and you live each day as who you really are ( in a positive way), you will attract better people, places, situations, things, and experiences your way as they are fully aligned with you! The bullshit will filter itself out.

Always in every and any given situation know who you are, be who you are, and don’t allow anyone or anything to change who you are if you are happy with who you are. Love yourself in such a way other people can tell you love yourself!

Be Kind, Be Considerate, Be Open Minded, Understand the World Around You

It’s one thing to understand the self, but if you have the ability to understand the world around you and those that grace it you’re onto something great. People will have different views and opinions to you, and this is perfectly fine. Listen to them, try to understand them, and always be able to agree to disagree. When President Trump was in power I learned this concept a lot! I also learned this concept when there were a significant number of black people who lost their lives in the USA shortly after George Floyd’s death. Not everyone around me felt how I felt, and I am a very vocal person. The learning I had is to understand my opposition even if I didn’t agree with it.

Outside of this context and political events, generally speaking understand what is happening around you, and don’t take everything at face value. Form your own viewpoint but understand it!

Being a kind, considerate, and open minded person sounds great! But it also makes a person rounded in their energy and personality. Not only that being kind allows you to be authentic too and read other people’s responses to your kindness and energy, and you can filter out who and what is not needed.

The world is a big place, don’t ever place yourself in a box, get out there, travel, experience, see, do, like, dislike, and experience all life has to offer for you. Even when times are hard and you encounter a negative experience, learn from it. Take new challenges and experiences that come your way that seem safe to do, sometimes a new experience or direction can open up something you never imagined to be possible. Don’t be fearful too much, a natural cautiousness is needed in life, but a fear that holds you back is a hindrance. Use fear as a motivator if you can, if there is something you wish to do or achieve and have a natural fear, take small steps towards it, and where possible minimise the fear and risks, move forward with confidence.

Connect With Nature

Just get out there! Open spaces, woods, forests, rivers, the sea, ocean, lakes, parks, beaches, anywhere that is not a concreate jungle go and spend time there. Just walk, think, observe, plan, express gratitude,  journal write, exercise, meditate whatever! Just go! And take your kids if you have them too.

 I was born in London so I’m a ‘big city girl’ naturally, and always will love the city, and the vibe of being from a place like London that can be found in many other cities around the world too. It was not until I had the experience of living outside of a city that I appreciated nature, I have moved back to the city now, but I do have lovely outside spaces to escape to often with lakes, woodland, parks etc.  Connect with nature, you will never regret it! Make it a life habit.

Notes on Grief: What I’ve Learned

Since the start of 2022 I’ve not been able to write a thing really. In fact, this week is the first week I have properly, wholeheartedly, fully, and intentionally sat down and written something that is creative, over one year later. In 2020 the pandemic Covid-19 started this really changed life as I knew it, my son’s school closed, strict lock downs, curfews,  it was crazy. No doubt many of you in your part of the world experienced some of this too.

Then in 2021 my dear mum fell ill with cancer, and eventually passed away. I did write about it, during my experience of her dying I wrote a small memoir as I had a paranormal ‘afterlife’ experience following her death. However, the grief stopped me in my tracks, it impacted me in ways that I never imagined. Mainly my ability to really do my job and write. My mind was pulled in so many different directions about death and I had so many questions. I did learn a few things about managing grief, how to handle a love one who is dying, and trying to remain as ‘normal’ as you can once they have left you.

Get Prepared:

This may seem like such a strange thing to say but, ‘get ready’ literally in every way you can for your loved one’s departure. This will look and feel different for everyone. For me, as mentioned I had many questions about death that I had pondered before, such as the process and if there really is life after death.  When I learned Mum was ill these questions became a real focus for me, and I found that seeking the answers to them helped me to ‘get prepared’.

The best way for me personally to manage this stage of grief and prepare myself for my mother’s death was to read, read, read, and read more about the process of death. I didn’t focus on cancer and how this eats away at the body, for me part of my preparation was to understand what actually happens when someone dies, regardless of how they cross over. I found a wonderful book that put my mind, heart, soul, and nerves at so much ease. It’s ironic, the night I randomly came across the audio version of this book on YouTube, was the night Mum passed away. About no more than one hour after I started to listen. The Journey of Souls, by Dr. Michael Newton is a recommended read for anyone who has questions around the process of death.

Another way to get prepared mentally and emotionally for the physical departure of your love one is to remind yourself that, during their last days, weeks, months, and hours your job is to make them as comfortable as possible. Meaning, helping them to prepare for their own transition from this world. There were times I doubted the doctors, or  thought, ‘there must be something they can do.’ I had a real struggle with moving my mindset from ‘let’s keep Mum alive’ to ‘ let’s get Mum ready to leave us and make her comfortable in her journey’. This is a really hard thing to do, almost impossible at times, but one thing I have learned about managing grief is that you must shift the mind and emotions from battling to keep them alive  and caring for them in a way that you expect them to recover, to caring for them in a way that allows them to feel peace, at ease, and that it is okay for them to let go and cross over when they feel too  weak to battle themselves. This will of course look different and feel different for us all. For me, this meant trying to keep the peace with my siblings and not allow Mum to hear anyone in disagreement, stress, upset, etc. The last thing a person who is dying needs is to know that those who are caring for them in their last days are at war with each other. Things like forcing ( in a nice way of encouragement not physically) a person to eat who is literally dying and their body is shutting down, is something I learned  about as part of preparation also. As a person is dying clearly, they may want or even need the food and drink that may be prepared for them. Try not to be too pissed off about this, and allow them to take what they need and leave the rest.

Basically, when it comes to getting yourself prepared in the grief stage mentally, emotionally, physically, and even spiritually one must prepare themselves to let go, and accept what is happening. I found that I did this a bit too late! And it hit me very hard the morning I learned that Mum had passed, as I left it to the last moment to accept what was happening, but comfort came from the book I referenced above as I listened to it the night Mum was leaving us behind.

 

 

It’s Okay to Do Nothing, Literally:

Like I said, at the time Mum passed I lost the will, desire, focus, need, and dare I say it even dedication to continue to do my job and write. Just before I learned she was ill I was in the throws of writing my last mystery novel published in 2021. I dead-ass could not find the creativeness that I had before everything happened. It was like I just lost it overnight. I was very hard on myself, so hard that I forced myself to write and ended up writing a load of rubbish in the process, and even abandoned a novel I was about 30,000 words deep into. I scrapped the whole thing. What I have learned is that grief will grip you in the areas that you are most strong in and tear you down. For me creativity clearly. Allow this to happen and if it means you do nothing, literally, then so be it.

This may sound strange, I can imagine people thinking, ‘ how can I allow myself to do nothing I have kids to feed, bills to pay, a job to do etc.’ yeah, I hear you. I had and still have all of that too.  However, you must be kind on yourself and allow yourself that time to do less than you normally would, without feeling guilt, regret, fear, or any negative emotion that may come along with this. How long this will last for will be different for each person.

 For me, that process and part of managing grief took about a year. I tried, failed, and then just let it be and didn’t write, market, or do anything with regard to my writing. Damn, I didn’t even post blogs, share other author’s work, or take part as a host in book tours for about a year. Today, was the first time I signed up to help out other author’s as a tour host and share their work.

The point I wish to get across here is that, you are going to possibly feel like you can’t go on, you can’t do anything, or that you don’t feel in the mood to focus on whatever you were focused on before your love one fell ill, and/or passed away. If this happens just know it is okay, part of the process, and you need to allow this stage of grief to happen. If not you will hit a state of burn out. Which, yes, you’re correct if you guessed this happened to me. I pushed through and really tried to continue to write to the point that I burnt out. Not only that, at the same time I was trying to home-school, manage my personal life, and managing all that happens when a parent dies and you need to manage their estate,  it was a mountain of stress! Don’t burn yourself out, it will prolong your period of grief, and prolong the feeling of ‘I don’t want to do anything.’ Just be… simply be… get out in nature a lot, reflect, go inward during this time of ‘I don’t want to do x’ and allow the healing to happen. You will emerge on the other side full of beans and ready to get back to whatever it was you were focused on, and even be more engaged, inspired, dedicated etc.

Make Note Of Your Anger:

Depending on the circumstances and how you learn about your loved one’s illness/and or death you may find you are angry. So angry that you could possibly do or say things you regret. You don’t want this. Anger is a normal human emotion, when a person is ill emotions run high ( for those who are caring for them), confusion, upset, there’s a lot of negative energy that can surface depending on situations. For me, as Mum had kept her illness from us of course I was naturally very angry and shocked. One thing I learned is that this emotion directed to an ill person, or anyone else for that matter is a hindrance  and does not help with managing grief.

 Anger can also be expressed between loved ones who are not ill, siblings etc. Make a note of why people are angry, yourself as well, try to understand why and then work through the anger to find resolutions. It’s not an emotion you can avoid totally but it is one that you can manage, so that it is not detrimental to family relationships, and the person who is currently ill, and your own emotional and mental health.

Once you can (try) to understand the root causes of anger, try to see what would reduce, ease, or even remove feelings of anger. In some cases nothing can be done, and if so the best advice in my experience is to acknowledge anger don’t dismiss anyone’s feelings of anger especially your own! Write down why your angry and explore the reasons privately if it is your own personal anger you are managing.

Then it sounds cliché but you really need to let that shit go! Burn some sage and clear the air! I’m not joking. Let it go. No one wants to pass away knowing people are angry at them or over them, especially if you love them. It’s also not a great environment to have anger resonating between those who are not ill, but are experiencing the same emotional upset over a loved one’s passing or ill health. Let it go, once the reason for the anger  has been established… I seriously mean it… let that shit go!

Allow Yourself to Think of The Future:

It can feel very strange to even consider ‘what next’ or the future once a loved one has departed. It’s almost as if you are frozen in the very state of mind, situation, place, location, etc you were when they passed. It is hard to see the future or even plan for it. I get that and this was my experience. Looking back, one thing I learned was when I thought of Mum and what she would want following her physical death, I know for a fact it would not be for me to remain frozen in time! In fact, one thing she made me promise was to ‘keep going’  literally she told me, ‘ if J.K Rowling can do it, so can you!’ meaning she wanted me to keep writing and follow in the footsteps of the famous British author’s success J.K Rowling. As I write this and look over at Mum’s picture to the left of me, I actually am smiling so much. I remember this conversation well, it was one of the last ones that we had before she lost her ability to speak. My point here is that it’s likely that your loved one also would want you to go out and be your best self, work on your goals, dreams, hopes, and passions just as you were (or with increased motivation) before you learned they were ill and/or about to pass away. You should do this. Clearly, allow yourself the time to be idle as mentioned above, then you must, must, must, return to your goals and dreams and create the future you want for yourself.

One thing death will teach you is that life really is short, I’m telling  you it is! Not a moment should be wasted. Mum was fit, healthy, and did not look any of the seventy years she was when she passed away. She could have passed for late fifties early sixties, apart from the odd ache here or there Mum’s health was good. Her time ran out, and it can happen to any one of us. Therefore, you must use the time you have here to create what you envision. Slowly, get back on your horse and look to the future. That new job, house, car, hobby you have had your eye on, allow yourself time and then go for it. I found it helpful to have something that you wish to complete, work on, or return to ( in your own time) as you go through your grief. In the moments when you feel ‘okay’ and not focused on the sadness that you’re experiencing, turn to this happy thought, goal, task, whatever it is even if it’s just in thought. Meaning you don’t have to take action yet, just think about it, contemplate it, write down what it is you wish to or need to do. Let me make it clear again, there is no need for action at all … I took no action hardly on my writing goals, instead I made notes, collected ideas, read a lot, and thought about ‘what’s next’ so I had something to return to. I hope you can find something that you wish to return to also, or even if the mood takes you during your down time or period of doing little to nothing while you process your loss.

 

Keep Their Memory Alive!

 I touched on this a little in my memoir  My Mum and Me, Messages From Beyond The Grave keeping a loved one’s memory alive, who has passed is a very personal thing. By this I mean how you go about it. Some religions, faiths, practices dedicate steps to this, for myself this is true my African-Caribbean heritage does not allow for those who have died to be forgotten. In my case, I have an area dedicated to Mum’s memory which is just to my left as I write this now in my new home! Before this it was in the room Mum slept in when she stayed in our old house. If this is something that appeals to you do keep your loved one near, pictures, personal belongings etc. Don’t hide them away, proudly display your loved ones who are now ancestors in your home, or even carry their pictures with you.

I have found this a great source of comfort and often talk to Mum’s picture as if she were in the room with me! Birthdays, Christmas, and special occasions may be hard for you emotionally. The year Mum passed just a few months later it was Christmas without her, and before that it was her birthday, my own birthday was just a few weeks before she passed also. It was hard, and it does not get easier I will not say that, but it gets more manageable if you keep their memory alive and not forget them.

I have had two Christmas celebrations without Mum, the first one I didn’t even put up a tree. This was so unusual for me and for my son to experience. At his young age he has never not known a Christmas without this. Last year, I went all out, I did not forget Mum, I remembered her around the celebrations, but I tried to continue as she would have ( and no doubt your loved one) would have wanted during the second Christmas without her.

I managed to do this by having her memory around our home already, keeping her alive so it felt as she is with us. Like I said, grief does not get easier, it gets more manageable. Looking back these steps mentioned have helped me on my journey to managing life without Mum, and processing her sudden and untimely death. I really hope they help someone else too.

90 Days of Writing: How Did You Start Writing? #90DaysBlogChallenge

A very good question! For day #2 of my #90DaysBlogChallenge. In all honesty you could say out of pure creative, therapeutic, time-passing, chance! I never really premeditated this career move, or making it an actual profession I take seriously at all. Here’s the thing I guess while it’s true that I’ve always been a writer. Journals, diaries etc I’ve always loved the written word, and placing my thoughts down . (I have some journals from my school days, I read back and laugh at how my eleven-sixteen year old mind worked back then), in all honesty I never sat down and said, ‘ you’re going to do this for your real job, or at least try to lol.’

Where Did it All Start?

The first ever book I penned was a 90,000 word novel A Stranger in France. It was rough as hell in terms of the manuscript. I had no conscious thought for ‘how to be a good technical writer’ back then, but it’s a good story. This is when I realised my talent, and that a good writer is a GOOD STORY TELLER not (just) a good technical writer. As you can pay people to become good with grammar etc, and do that part. Plus you learn it as you write more. Story-telling natural talent, is not something you can teach, or pay people to really give you naturally. Yes, you can attend courses, read books I’ve written a writer’s reference too on writing good romance, but all they give you and all anyone can give you is, an outline and guide. You, the writer, must bring your talent and A-game and that’s what makes a good story teller- you-your talent. You have it or you don’t I feel. You as a writer will know, regardless of who says what.

Anyway, even with my lack of regard for being a technically good writer with grammar etc (at the time in 2015/16), my focus was just to write and get my idea down on paper then edit it all later. To my surprise after sending it out to the first publisher I had ever approached, I got a response! A good one! A contract! OMG what happened??

So fast forward the first version was published in 2016, but I was very unhappy. with the publisher’s standards of working, and marketing, I learned a lot. The main difference between a good publisher willing to help you grow, has high standards with regards to quality, and ones that are really not worth the paper they offer you the contract on. Especially as you market the hell out of your book, to bring them money, but the end product is piss poor if you want me to keep it real. So that’s how I fell into writing.

I wrote that book because I had a story inside me to tell, and wanted to get it on paper. I had no idea about self-publishing or KDP at the time. I was a total virgin writer in every way! Once my cherry was popped in a way that woke me up, I learned all I could about self-publishing, how to do it well, and the role of a good publisher. I kinda didn’t really trust anyone with my work for a while. I kept writing, self publishing, and loved it I did a few books but then found my home I’m at now. A publisher who I am happy with so far! And they are happy with me.

What Was Going on in Life When You Penned That First Novel?

At the time I started to write my first ever novel, I was thirty-four years old I was running a book club in London too. Some of you may already know this. I ran it for about five years, met some wonderful girls (it was just for girls). We’d meet in London’s biggest book store Waterstones with five floors of books! It was heaven, and I was reading at least two books a month if not more back then. I just opened up a word document, and started to write what was in my heart, how I felt, and what characters came to me. I was also in a terrible relationship, nearing the end. I think that writing actually gave me the strength to say ‘times up, good bye’. So I did! I moved forward with life. Writing really was my saviour, I went on to write more books. Now I’m on about number fourteen (off the top of my head), at the time that I write this. It’s not a hobby, it’s a habit, something I have to do, something that came to me later in life, something that was ‘woken up’ within me, my talent came out from experiencing trauma and self-realisation! For that bull-shit that happened I am thankful for.

Never once did I imagine that in under five years of being a traditionally published author, I’d be an award-winning and best-selling one. Nope, never. I never had any of those common goals or wishes many writers have in mind, in order to 1. validate themselves as a writer 2. validate their talent as a writer 3. make them feel as though ‘they’ve made it’. It just happened by writing and being myself. My only goal has only been to get these characters out of my head , on paper, and into stories that I would love to read and hope others would. I guess I’m the kind of writer that writes for me first, and then hopes others will enjoy it. Sure, if I notice that readers like a particular story, style, series I create etc I will aim to keep them happy! But I guess when I sit down to write, the first thing that comes to me is ‘what do I want to create?’ rather than ‘what will sell?’ ‘ x,y,z would love this’, if that makes sense.

So my route into writing was a very random one, it flourished from experiencing joys with getting a publishing contract very easily or early, but not being happy with that experience, to learning myself how to put out my work, to then securing a publisher who is on the same page as me! My only hope is one day of course for one of the BIG, BIG BIG publishing houses to take onboard a manuscript of mine. But for the here and now I just want to keep going as I am, just write.

What Else Do You Write?

Outside of romantic suspense and crime/thriller/mysteries, magazine writing came later, I expanded on my love of non-fiction writing. I wrote for one magazine that did not stand the test of time sadly, and carried out editorial here. Then I landed my gig with Aspiring Authors Magazine LLC. Then I was blessed with an Associate Editor’s role for a romance literary magazine this year. Tallon Lake publishes quarterly.

How did you get into writing? Leave me a comment, blog it and link back to it here. Join in the writing prompt challenge use #90DaysBlogChallenge

Book Review: Time Passes Differently Here, By Vivian Zems ( Poetry) 5 Beautiful Stars

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With seventy pages, a poem per page, there’s probably I’d say around close to seventy poems here. They were just beautiful to absorb and contemplate. I found fourteen of my favs, I really had to narrow it down. I came across this author’s work on Facebook after she shared it, and thought why not dip in!? Very glad that I did. I do enjoy poetry and these were very touching reads. To the point that I wished I could actually write poetry myself… I can’t!
About the book:

This poetry collection is observational and inspirational, challenging the reader to contemplate life, death, passion, and adversity. Race is not left out, as history is revisited with violence, and conciliation embraced.
Time does not follow its usual trajectory in 2020; it passes and moves with a breathtaking difference here.

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Five Beautiful Stars!

Time Passes Differently Here features a collection of super bite-sized poetry, the book can be read in one sitting. I found each one very well developed, which is a weird thing to say as we’re talking about poetry, not characters as in fiction. What I mean by ‘well developed’  is I felt as though each line, word, and poem came from the heart. I also really enjoyed the author’s style of poetry.  It was almost like if I really deeply took in what she was saying, I could see the metaphors and word play she has used. This is the development part I really loved, how she used her words and the meaning that came across as I read them.  I could then interpret the poems, and relate them to my own thoughts, feelings, and even see where she’s coming from. Not so much with what she’s said, but how she’s said it. It felt to me as I read almost like this author has sat down in some kind of reflective state to really write her words. I would guess possibly in a bench somewhere, a few of the poems make reference to benches! I felt like the author is a  people watcher, observer of life, and current affairs.

There were for me fourteen poems that I related to, as they reminded me of things I could relate to.

Poem’s Right- I love this one, as a crime fiction writer I loved the word play and the use of ‘rights’ we have related to a poem. It was cute.

Where’s the Time– I read it and thought, ‘that’s so me, where does the bloody time go?’

A World in Disarray– At times I felt like the author was referring to current affairs in politics, civil rights, and all that’s happened in 2020. I liked this poem a lot. Not because it’s political but because it’s so fitting for 2020 as a year.

Blood Speaks Louder– Very fitting with 2020, and powerful I liked it a lot.

Moot Question- Again I could relate, the first thing that came to my mind was #TeamNoFuckingSleep that’s me with all I’m juggling. I liked it.

Dad’s House- A very sad poem, a glimpse into the author’s own life possibly. I enjoyed it.

R.I.P George Floyd- I don’t need to explain this, if you follow my blog you know why I dig this poem.

The Sycamore Tree– I just loved this one, as it was  a beautiful account of seeing life from the POV of a tree LOL. Also, it made me think of the book I love ‘ Sycamore Row’ by John Grisham a very gritty, crime thriller, and controversial too. However the poem is nothing like John’s book or plot it was  just the use of this kind of tree, which is a main feature in John’s book too.

The Walk- Beautiful!

Nostalgia- It made me chuckle a bit, thinking about life pre-mask wearing and Covid-19.

Laugh Again- Beautiful.

If I Could- I read this and instantly thought of my son, and I wondered when the author wrote this whom she was referring to!

Observations at Lunch Time– Another one which made me feel that the author spends time on park benches! And why not? I love it there too. It made me think, ‘I need to get out more with my note pad too.’

What is Peace– Stunning, and I agreed with every word.

Overall, I’ve not actually read poetry that has resonated,  left me wanting more, and even thinking ‘could I do this, could I be that brave, how would I even start to write poetry?’  in a long , long, time.  It was a wonderful reading experience, and as a reader I would give this five beautiful stars out of five. There was no sadness, depression, hurt, or pain it was more like an uplifting reading experience. Like I said I felt like via the author’s metaphors, word play, and her delivery style not so much what she said but how she said it, with such bite-sized words to me made me realise that writing, writers, and true talent are not just for or about those of us that spin fiction. It’s the poets out there  too, who know how to use less than fifty words and pack a punch! I would read more. At the time of writing this Time Passes Differently Here is FREE to read on Kindle Unlimited, and also in paperback too!

Grab a copy here.  for USA 

And here for UK

 

 

Rambles, Life, Reflections, Just Write! #amwriting

Afternoon people! Happy Monday. It’s been a while since I’ve sat down and written something personally from me. Where have I been hiding?

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Life During The Pandemic…

Well, since March and my last personal dive into my life with you all, things have been pretty much the same. While lock down restrictions eased, and then were enforced again in my part of the world, my family and I pretty much stayed put indoors. We were like, ‘you guys go out first and see what happens’ LOL.

It’s so sad, but I predicted or anticipated a ‘second wave’ of Covid- 19 and that’s pretty much what has happened. Am I against wearing a mask? Hell no! I understand people may find it uncomfortable, but, damn….what about your health and the health of others? Anyway, it’s an ongoing debate in every corner of the world. I wear mine and will continue to do so.

I have been homeschooling yes, but then decided to allow my son an actual holiday from it all, after all it is summer. I aim to restart again in a few weeks, as to be honest, I really don’t know if I will  send him back to the classroom. Regardless of what the governments around the world may want, I really am not sure, until I see enough evidence to suggest that, it’s safe! For us all, not just because ‘they are children and less at risk.’ Both my son and I have delicate health so I need to be careful. Moving on enough about Covid-19!

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The Writer’s Life During The Pandemic!

In a way, Covid-19 has been a blessing for me, it’s allowed me to be so productive while stuck in the house, going to bed late and waking up late too.  Since March I have written three books! Two have been released  365 Days of Writing Prompts for Romance Writers  which seems to have been a God send to some authors. Also The Art of Short Story and Novella Writing.  The third I’ve just completed which is novella #1 of my ‘Unsolved Mysteries Series’ I’m working on. I’m super excited, to move away from romantic suspense (for a second) and work on this. The burst of inspiration came really while writing a romantic crime thriller novel, and after a discussion with my publisher.  I have over five book ideas planned, one written  I’m half way through the second. The goal is to get the second one done this week, as it’s novella length.  Now I’m pretty much done with Sacrifices due for release on the 30th SeptemberI think for a moment I’m ‘all romanced out.’ In terms of writing and motivated to write in my other genre  I love. I feel 2021, will see a lot of work put out here. Don’t worry though I will be back to the romantic suspense!

The pandemic has also allowed me to narrate one of my own books, which is done and out there for the world. It was a wonderful experience and I would do it again, for sure. I’ve also placed book #1 of two of my romance series in audio too, not narrated by me. So overall  I need to express some gratitude to the pandemic, my productivity has increased without a doubt.

 Reading Life During The Pandemic!

Oh man this has been the beauty for me during this time I love to read, and always wish I had more hours in the day for this. I’ve read some fantastic books. A lot of  them have been non-fiction, empowerment, and spirituality genres. I’ve also really been drawn to short stories of all genres! I think this came after writing a book about writing them LOL. And being drawn to write some myself.  My Kindle Unlimited membership has really served its purpose over this pandemic.

Keeping Amused At Home During The Pandemic!

One of my other superpowers is cooking, I just loooooooooooooooove to cook! Foods from around the word too, I’d say I’m pretty good. I’ve never been much of a baker though, I found this super cute set at the supermarket one day and bought it. Not only does the food taste good, it looks cute while cooking.

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So that same day, for the first time ever in my life I tried to bake some home made bread. Here’s the before….

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Ta  da…. and after!

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I was so impressed, I buy fresh bread daily,  now I’m think I should just make my own. For my first attempt not bad, and it tasted really good!

Reflections on the World!

In all honesty, I am keen to see some healing happen. I think back to May time when we had the whole #BlackLivesMatter movement ( which still matters to me by the way), just because the protests may have died down, the cause in my view has not. I pray daily for the lives lost at the hands of the police, and generally due to the colour of a person’s skin.

I also pray daily for the pandemic to just ‘go away’! And also as we move into the winter time, and the flu season rolls around, that there is not a lot of worry regarding general flu and Covid-19.

I pray for school teachers forced to return to work around the world, and the children forced to return for whatever reason. Also, their parents  who are worried as hell. But, they need earn a living.

I pray the political heat in the USA eases, that people vote and remove Trump. I said it. I’m not a fan, and you all probably know I’m not as well. Personally, I find him a man full of racist views and white supremacy, this is based on half the shit that comes out of his mouth, and actions. I’m not making assumptions, this is what he teaches people he’s about. Even those overseas can see it.

And the protests in Europe over the president that the people of the country Belarus, feel has rigged the re-election have justice!  I pray for  you.

Last but by no means least, the poor students who have lost places at university, due to the exam grading system, and with lack of actual taking exams in the UK. I pray for you guys! It’s hard and tough right now.  As an ex-teacher of students of this age, my heart really goes out to you guys! Listening in to the BBC World Service radio 24/7 I’ve also heard reports on students in Thailand calling for overhaul of the monarch’s involvement in education- good luck fighting for your cause. The students in Africa who are just now taking their exams, due to the impact of the pandemic, good luck and I pray for A grade results and university places!

I hope you guys have all been well wherever you are reading this update and ramble from me. I hope your family is safe too, and some how your life is not too disrupted by the changes we’ve all had since March this year. Catch you soon! Keep well.

 

 

Daily Gratitude Challenge Day #16: Hobbies and Interests #DailyGratitudeChallenge

I’ve just read a really cool blog post by this blog I’ve been following Suzy Speaks. It’s day sixteen of her challenge she has set, for herself and her followers to write about a different topic they are grateful for and follow the  #DailyGratitudeChallenge. While it seems I’ve missed fifteen days of great topics, I’ll jump in today as hobbies and interests are something I’m deeply grateful for, in fact they kinda make me who I am.

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Astrology and The Solar System:

I’m a qualified astrologer with a diploma in astrological studies. The study of the solar system from this science I’m  extremely grateful for, and my love of this subject. It started out while I was a teen, if you remember the shop Woolworths I stumbled across the annual astrology book for Aquarius, with a horoscope for each day of the year. I bought one ever year! Until Woolworths when into administration of course. The love of the stars, Moon, planet’s energies never left me. I ended up completing my studies about one or two years back.

Why am I so grateful for this science? Well, while many think this is ‘woo woo witchy esoteric stuff’ (and I would agree LOL), if helped me to understand me, life events, where I am going and even confirmed that, yes I am born to be a writer or working the journalistic field. Simply by a detailed study of my own birth chart, with my actual date and time of birth. Basically, astrology give me a lot of healing and direction in life. When I studied the chart of my son and other people, I was amazed at the accuracy I had from friends whose charts I read. I was able to confirm things about their life, or experiences I could not have known. In the case of my son, it also confirmed his approach and experiences with learning.

The study of the Universe will never leave me, I follow it closely and look at what’s happening in the world, and the planet’s energies. Overall, I am grateful as this skill I have learned has helped me to help others heal as well as myself, and it’s just a cool thing to say, ‘yeah I’m an astrologer’ LOL.

 

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My Sewing Machine and Fashion Design:

My nanna died when I was fourteen, her name’s Lucinda. She never worked she had eleven children, she was a homemaker and my grandfather worked. She arrived in the UK  with my grandfather from the Caribbean islands, and basically looked after all the family. It’s her I owe my interest and skill with a sewing machine to. She loved to sew, and I later on at school I  picked the subject ‘textiles’, which is now what we call ‘fashion design’ all these years later, as an option for my GCSEs at school when I was fourteen. I gained a C grade, not bad. It was in this class I learned how to use a machine, sew and express myself creatively with fabrics and materials. I also really loved my teacher, she was Italian if I remember correctly and so funky with her dress sense.

Later on, I started to collect dress making patterns for clothes, got my own machine and just before I had my son I was obsessed with making dresses. (That I had to wait until I had him to wear, as I was pregnant) . It took a while, YouTube, buying books to understand the patterns, and learn the craft to a more advanced level but I did it! I’ve not made a dress in about six years, since he was born. But I have my dress stand, and I named her Lucinda after my nana. As I write this I  feel like I should really go fabric shopping and do something.

In London, there is a high street called Goldhawk Road if I remember correctly, that has shop after shop after shop of fabric stores! I remember spending a lot of time there, and money before I had him.

I am grateful for this interest and hobby as, it really gave  me something to smile about when I was in school. I  looked forward to the classes, later on in life it also gave me a great sense of patience, working with accuracy, and learning the art of how to create clothing from materials. I am also grateful for it as I was heavily pregnant in the summer months, which was no fun and found myself indoors a lot of the time. My sewing machine and this interest gave me a pass time when it was too hot for me to leave the house.

 

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Civil Rights, Law, Politics

I just love this! I have an interest in all the above, I would not say it’s a hobby at all just an interest. That said, I am grateful for my interest in this area as it has allowed me to be able to make educated decisions, statements,  have opinions, and hold views on certain things that are backed up by rights and laws I am aware of, or have researched and can interpret.

I feel that this interest is probably something else that shapes me as a person, I won’t stand for anything that looks like it could be some kind of injustice, or breech of civil and human rights.  I am grateful for it as it has allowed me to be invested in causes such as women’s rights, human rights and the black lives matter movement.

Take a look at this cool daily gratitude challenge on Suzy Speaks and join in!

 

Writing Prompt: Dancing! #RagtagDailyPrompt #RDP

I’ve followed this blog RagTagDailyPromps for a little while,  today managed to log on just when they posted the prompt for the day so, I’ll take part today…’Dancing’

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One thing I just looooooooooooooooooove is dance, to watch it, do it, and learn it too! When I was about maybe seven  or eight years old, I attended my first ever dance class. It was ballet, tap and modern dance that I fell into. I kept this up until  about maybe 1999. I stopped as I suffered a knee injury! As a result all these years later I still have what the doctors called ‘fluid  on the joint’ of my right knee. It’s the reason I have trouble bending down or sitting on my knees, well, that and the fact that I’m the wrong side of thirty-five now LOL

One of the most fond memories I have of my dance classes is, when we did a choreographed dance to ‘ born to make you happy’ by Britney spears. I loved Britney as a pre-teen and teen. ( I still do if I’m honest with myself), but this song as a youngster in the 90s I adored, and really enjoyed the contemporary dance our class learned. We had a fantastic teacher, I remember everything down to my leotard I wore, sadly not all the steps. I’m thirty-seven we’re going  back to 1999 a long time ago!  Here’s the video for old times sake. As I play this in the background while I type, I still remember the words. Check out Britney’s moves! I love her.

 

 

 

Later in life, believe it or not, I actually learned the dance movies to Britney’s ‘Slave For You’. That was when this song first came out. I can’t get enough of the way Britney moves her body!! Generally when she dances. I find her a very talented dancer, many disagree and feel she’s ‘taught’.  While this is true, just like say Beyonce you can Brit has natural talent.  I learned the routine from @1:36 time stamp  to @1:53 it’s not even two mins BUT, it took a lot of practice,  laughs, pausing, and sweat LOL

 

 

I really like belly dancing too over the ‘lock down’ period this year, during the pandemic, I have watched some YouTubers who give classes. I even bought a scarf with bells to wrap around my waist while I TRY to do the routines. These days I don’t really dance that much, as in classes,  I feel that my knee would not be able to support doing any  highly choreographed dance that well, but I do still have a love for it.

When I was in my twenties I spent a hella-lot-a time in clubs with my girlfriends, before I became a mum or had any really responsibilities in life. Each weekend we headed to central London,  to the array of clubs we had back then.  In my early teens and twenties I was ( and still am) a massive fan of soulful house music and the UK’s ‘Old Skool Garage’ anthems!  In east London there were some great places, also the club ‘Fabric’ back then was a spot we’d go to a lot.

I can’t pin-point exactly what it is I love about dance, or any kind of exercise that is dance based. For example pilates, aerobics, yoga and even pole dancing! It could be the music, and my love for that. If there’s a song I love I automatically feel like moving to it sober or not LOL. I also like how good it is for the soul, I find it releases ‘happy vibes’. If time was not a problem I think I’d love to try to learn how to pole dance, but classic pole dancing that’s elegant as well as pole dancing for…well gentlemen’s clubs LOL ( Why not!)

I would also like learn salsa, it is a lot of fun. I only ever did one class with a girlfriend as it was more like  her finding a ‘date’, rather than something we’d do each week. In all honesty, it’s time for me between juggling life and writing, I just don’t have the time. If I did, I would love to return to dance classes — gentle ones due to my knee and see if I’ve still got it!

Do you like to dance? If so what do you like to dance to? Do you have a favouite song or music?

Writing Prompt: Tell Us About Your English Teacher… Damn! Okay

Stealing one of the personal blog prompts today from 365 Days of Writing Prompts for Romance Writers .  Wow my English teacher in what we’d call in the UK ‘secondary school’ I guess ‘high school’ to the rest of the world, in a nutshell he was a bit of  a mess! LOL.  I won’t name him, for now I’ll call him Mr. X.

 

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Where did I go to school?

In the depths of south London, Mum actually sent me out of the local area to school. At the time she didn’t feel the standard of education was great in our local area.. It was just a short bus ride away, about no more than thirty to forty five minutes from where we lived. It was a mixed gender school also, generally the school did have a good reputation back then. Lots of parents sent their children there. The only thing was, while the general reputation of the school was good….some classes were unruly! My English class was one of them LOL. Not me personally, when I was in school I behaved well, I was there to learn. I actually really enjoyed this subject, languages and design and technology too this is where I excelled. But my classmates were a hoot, to say the least. It was mainly the boys, we had a group of popular boys who loved to wind up our English teacher. There was also one particular female student who had a big problem with listening and behaving. To me, sitting at my table I just bit my lip and tried not to laugh!

What was your teacher like?

At the time when he taught my class Mr. X must have been in his late thirties to early forties. He was tall, very skinny! Had long, stinging , dirty blond hair, ALWAYS wore black and had bad breath. Thinking about it now all these years later, I bet he was some kind of goth. I left school in ’99 at sixteen, but it never really occurred to me why  he may have always wore black.

Anyway, like I said the class was a little troublesome and he spent a lot of his time shouting, mainly at the same students. His favourite line was ‘siiiiiiillllleeeence!’ Then, he’d slam a book or his hand on the desk, *cringe*. Nope, nine times out of ten that did not work, and he ended up splitting up the tables of students. In the end he gave us a seating  plan, so certain students couldn’t sit together.

As a teacher, looking back now all these years later was he a good one? No, not really. I say this as I myself after I left school went on to be a high school teacher, and spent ten years in the profession in the classroom. I worked my way up to head of my subject. On reflection compared to what  I know now , after teacher training he wasn’t a good one.

Did I learn…? Very little. Partly due to the class behaviour, but when the class was under control even then as I sit here and think, ‘what did I learn from Mr. X?’ I draw a blank!

Was it his fault? Hmmm it’s  a hard one. In all honesty, I think he was at that stage of what we call ‘teacher’s burn out’. When a teacher is so jaded about the profession they just collect their pay and that’s it.

Did  you get on?

In all honesty, I never really interacted with him much! I was one of the good kids there to learn, I just sat back and watched the ‘show’ every lesson. The battle of wits between him and the unruly kids. Did he ever shout at me? Yes, there were times when I got so bored I would talk, doodle, not really tune into what was going on. You could hardly blame me though if you were a fly on the wall. Did I ever talk back to him? Yeah, a couple of times as in all honesty I was one of the good kids, I felt ‘why are you picking on me!?’ as any teenager would at that time.

So in a nutshell, while English was one of my favourite subjects at school, sadly I never had a very inspirational or even dedicated teacher. It was more ‘crowd control’ at times in my lessons. Which is sad, because yes my grades in English did suffer, generally. And of course he did predict me and a lot of that class with low grades…. did I get a low grade  for my GCSE exams? yeah I got a C grade. This is not ‘low’ technically A-C is good, especially back then this was the 90s. But I was capable of so much more.

What happened after school?

Believe it or not, after school when I left I re-studied  English. I went to what you could call an  ‘online’ community school and sat some extra tests for another English qualification. I came out with a B, now that’s more like it! I didn’t do this right away, I was probably in my early twenties as it was at this point I was searching for work, and what I wanted to do. Employers (at the time) wanted A-C grades in English, okay I had that I got a C but I wanted to re-do it so I did.

Generally I feel on reflection that my English teacher at school had a lot on his plate, but even if the class was golden he was very jaded and job hardened I think, on reflection.  Sadly my English teacher did not spark my love for reading or writing, this came myself! Just something I enjoyed with little inspiration from the person who really introduced myself and classmates to it. You can’t win them all I guess!  I  don’t think I would go back and change things, as in the end it panned out okay. I just hope if Mr.  X is still alive if he ever thinks about his time in the classroom, that at some point in his career he can look back and say, ‘I loved that job even if class 7PU were little shits’ LOL.

 

 

 

 

Update on Book Narration… Here’s The Finished Product! #non-fiction #spirituality

A few months ago I wrote a really detailed post about how to have your books produced in audio, it’s really not as hard as many authors may think.  I ‘m in the process of producing some of my books right now. Also, I shared that I was narrating a non-fiction book for another author. Here it is! She’s on sale and doing well. I loved narrating this book, you guys who know me well know that, subjects like this are of great enjoyment for me to read. I have some promo codes for anyone who is on Audible, who would like to listen in to the book in this version! just contact me here. and send me a message to say you’d like a audio book code. Here’s a bit about the book… I narrated under a pen name of Amethyst!

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Your Intuition Calling development to increase your abilities.

Are you interested in how you can increase the joy and happiness in your life? Are you currently looking for a way to change your life from within? Are you wondering why your mind continues to change as you meet new people. In this book, it will provide all that and more….

This book will introduce you to basics about intuition and show you how to use it properly. You will also learn more about meditation, power of prayer, and all aspects of your mind.

You may be quick to ask what intuition is and you are not alone.

We are all born with a set of powerful abilities and one of them is intuition. As the world changed, we have lost track of this natural ability. But throughout history, we find that intuition has helped us carve our paths.

Here is what you will get with this book.

  • Common traits of intuition
  • Surviving emotional vampires
  • Understanding what intuition is
  • Shielding and clearing your energy
  • Different types of meditation techniques
  • How to move and stay on your Intuitive path

 

Why should you be interested in this book?

This guide also coincides with a consistent meditation practice that combined can greatly benefit the practitioner.

Experience a new and higher way to live life to its fullest daily.

This book isn’t teaching dogma or telling you something is good or bad for that matter, but it is a practical guide to help use the forces that you cant see to improve your life.

Check Out Amazon Here

 

From Award Winner to Amazon Best Selling Author – My Thank you.

BestSeller Status

 

Good afternoon guys,

I really am trying to be happy every writer wants to be an Amazon ‘best seller’ one day. Personally I was happy with  just awards! That’s another blog post lol it made me very emotional to win ‘Best Romance 2017’.  But, in all honesty first I want to thank everyone personally who has pre-ordered a copy of 365 Days of Writing Prompts for Romance Writers and every future reader of my writer’s reference. From the bottom of my heart I appreciate you, and I hope one of my prompts and tips on crafting realistic and page-turning romance turns you in to a best-seller and/or award-winner too in the genre.  I hope I spark some great stories! I woke up to an orange banner and notification I just became an Amazon Best Selling Author. I find it ironic I have achieved this by penning something outside my normal genre LOLZ.

It’s a massive achievement for me from Award Winner and I thank you. I’ve never thought about this day, or how I would feel I just want to write because…well, I can! And love it. The truth is this achievement has come during the aftermath of a very serious event in Atlanta.

Seriously, I’m grieving  people I woke up this morning  switched on the news again, and was over run with emotion just as I was when I went to bed last night. My good news didn’t even stem the anger, upset, frustration and personal trauma I felt as I watched the scenes in Atlanta. Another black man has died unjustly at the hands of a white police officer, and it was my intention to focus in on a blog post about this! Not write this thank you note. I am humbled, thankful and extremely appreciative, but I’m grieving to the point I could not greet my Facebook family as I normally do with a ‘good morning’.

Once again, thank you and good luck all romance writers around the world.

Love Kim